not fitting in

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, Col.3:12

I know everyone just wants to have fun. Here is a hard word: life in Christ is not about “having fun”. That is not why we are here on this planet, as ambassadors and witnesses of the Kingdom of God. I know, I’m “no fun”. I realize that.

I do love life: i love nature, birds, trees, flowers, gardens, feeding people, talking to people, making things pretty, writing, and being useful. Did i mention I love babies. I love music and art and mountains and beaches. I love the fall season, the leaves, the weather, the crisp air. I like the beautiful things God has created. He created people. He is redeeming people. He gives grace, mercy and love to people.

That is why i do not like Halloween. I do not think there is anything to “celebrate”. Halloween in fact makes me sad. Why do i not “have fun” with it? Because i am not a pagan anymore, as i once was. ( I know what and who Halloween is meant to honor.) And because i care about people. People get taken, hurt, raped, tortured and ritually killed. That hurts my heart. It makes me hurt. I have feelings of empathy and compassion for those who have been ritually abused, and for those who have been killed. I hurt for them. Some of them I know (the survivors). I have respect for them and care about them. I am sad for them, I hurt for them. This makes me “no fun” on Halloween. I have been in a witchcraft satanic place of worship. Yes, built for this purpose. For torture and killing and worship of the god of this world. I can no longer “have fun” with Halloween.

But Jesus came to rescue from death. And that He does. He rescues lost sheep. God rescues from the domain of darkness and transfers them to the Kingdom of His beloved Son. He cares about them. I was one He rescued. I now want to care about people like He does. I want to join Him in rescuing the sheep. My flesh does not want to follow Jesus into this level of love….. my flesh would rather have “fun” and of course I’d like to be accepted as “normal” by everyone I know in Evangelical Christianity. My flesh wants to be “accepted” and to “fit in” and be “normal”….. but Jesus leads me by the Spirit, further away from my flesh. Yes it hurts. It feels like death. And it is. To my flesh, my “self”. But the real life, LIFE IN CHRIST! Christ’s life, is worth it all. Lord Jesus, help us all die to ourselves, and live YOUR LIFE, in your power, sacrificially, in love and compassion, for the others.

The Safe Place

Yesterday I again found myself in a face to face encounter with the unseen forces. I had two long conversations with S., a homeless woman my age, who was pushing her packed shopping cart with her three pet rats. It turns out she is one of those who has, since a little girl, been the victim of the satanic torture, abuse, terror and mind control of the wicked earthly “powers that be” that the Lord speaks of in Ps. 2 and Ps.21:11.

She was filled with paranoia, fear and hate for those who have hurt her. As she gripped her mace can, she told me exactly how she got her bruises and burn marks. Her STD was affecting her whole body. Demons were speaking wicked lies to me; I was speaking Truth of God’s Word to her. This shut up the demons, but she was listening. God wanted me to just show her His love, and build trust. There was much more to these conversations than I can possibly articulate here.

She lamented that the evil men who have tortured her have gotten away with it. I assured her that they ultimately will not: that God will judge all sin, evil and wickedness. The demons in her told me that this is not true, but I again answered with Bible Truth of God’s righteous character, and again, this shut them up and she was listening. I could see this Truth gave her a bit of hope.

The Lord wanted me to tell her where the safe place is. “There is no safe place!”, she insisted. I assured her there was a spiritual safe place: the large loving arms to hide under, the big cupped hands to hide in, the safe shelter to run to, the hiding place that is the Lord Jesus.